We pretty much have to write a new paper every two days. They are not hard, but they are focused upon fairly controversial issues that frankly I have not really thought about.
First:
I had to read something that Rush Limbaugh wrote about giving out condoms in high schools, then respond to it. I had to write about my opinions on it, and everyone in the classroom started fighting about their opinions. I suppose giving out condoms in school is rather straightforward, but the school should have them available. Maybe handing them out is a bad idea, I agree about that. Schools shouldn't JUST teach abstinence though. Not everyone is going to make the choice to remain a virgin until marriage, and schools should teach teenagers ALL the ways to stay safe. Abstinence plus sex ed (condoms, safe sex, etc.).
Second:
The paper that's due tomorrow that I'm neglecting to write until the last minute. The statement he gave us was "Should mentally ill men and women be sterilized from having children?" That's such an incredibly broad thing to talk about. Also, I need clarification of the term "mentally ill." I mean, mentally ill can mean depression or Tourettes (or perhaps eating disorders....), gender identity problems (not really sure if that is really a mental illness, but it's more of a displacement I guess...)... but it can also mean schizophrenia, multiple personality disorders, autism, down's syndrome, and anything and everything inbetween.
I don't even know where to start. It's hard to separate my emotional feelings from reality here. I mean, I believe everyone should have the right to have children. I cannot imagine anyone taking away the ability for me to have kids. That would be awful. When I look at it from a more realistic point of view, I realize that some people cannot take care of themselves, so how would they be able to take care of a child?
There's also legal issues to deal with when it comes to mentally ill people having children. It's illegal to have sex with a mentally ill person (you know what I mean when I say that... like, people who have a certain extent of mental retardation) because they cannot legally give consent. So, it would be illegal to get someone like that pregnant, unless they are both cognatively challenged...in that case, I'm not sure what to say to that...
I suppose it all has to do with if the parents are not deemed unfit parents.
I'm so confused about this topic, it's ridiculous.
ANYWAYS,
I broke ABC today because it was my grandma's and great-grandma's birthday today, so we celebrated.
Pizza and cake.
Shit shit shit.
Needless to say, I will spend a couple hours at the gym tomorrow to burn off some extra calories.
Tomorrow is..... 100 calories. haha, what a difference from today.
I'm sure it's totally possible. I'm hanging out with my new boy-love-interest tomorrow. oh, I also have another story, but I might just start a new blog post for that one because this one is already much too long.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
Control is such a bitch
3rd day of ABC.
I just went over 300 calories.
I threw it all back up.
I think I just like taste.
I can handle being hungry.
Anyways, I'm not sure if I can forget about the calories I just threw up....
I'm going to forget about them.
About 150 cals today then.
I've decided to never weigh myself naked. Always with clothes on to make myself heavier.
I'm fasting until tomorrow night now because my grandparents are taking my family out to dinner because it's my grandma's and great-grandma's birthday.
Let's hope I order something small.
Anyways, I've got to go to work soon. I better make sure I don't smell like puke....
Anabelle
I just went over 300 calories.
I threw it all back up.
I think I just like taste.
I can handle being hungry.
Anyways, I'm not sure if I can forget about the calories I just threw up....
I'm going to forget about them.
About 150 cals today then.
I've decided to never weigh myself naked. Always with clothes on to make myself heavier.
I'm fasting until tomorrow night now because my grandparents are taking my family out to dinner because it's my grandma's and great-grandma's birthday.
Let's hope I order something small.
Anyways, I've got to go to work soon. I better make sure I don't smell like puke....
Anabelle
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
Oh, back to school I go...
Definitely not liking the fact that I'm back to a regular schedule. I was enjoying waking up whenever I wanted. My classes are pretty interesting.
Except for english. I just wrote a little paper why I support sex ed in schools and if i support the distribution of condoms in high schools? why not have them there? safety first, right?
I mean, handing them out to everyone seems rather useless, but they should be there if needed.
UPDATES:
1. I'm talking to my ex-fiance-boyfriend-whatever-you-want-to-call-him again. I promised I'd stay friends with him, but I haven't talked to him for a month. I told him that I missed him....totally meaning it in a friendly way, but he didn't take it that way. He got all pissed and was accusing me that I only was talking to him because I needed some sort of emotional need fulfilled. Fuck that. Don't flatter yourself.
2. Day 2 of ABC. Things are going wonderful. I bought specific food for my lower calorie days. Things are staring to get back on track.
3. I've started going to the gym again. It's getting harder to jog when your tummy is completely empty. Oh well.
4. I'm back on my sleeping pill regimen. Not too happy about that, but oh well. Shit happens.
I'm almost seeing my new guy. Working on it as we speak. I'll keep you posted.
Wish me luck on day 3 of ABC!
Anabelle
Except for english. I just wrote a little paper why I support sex ed in schools and if i support the distribution of condoms in high schools? why not have them there? safety first, right?
I mean, handing them out to everyone seems rather useless, but they should be there if needed.
UPDATES:
1. I'm talking to my ex-fiance-boyfriend-whatever-you-want-to-call-him again. I promised I'd stay friends with him, but I haven't talked to him for a month. I told him that I missed him....totally meaning it in a friendly way, but he didn't take it that way. He got all pissed and was accusing me that I only was talking to him because I needed some sort of emotional need fulfilled. Fuck that. Don't flatter yourself.
2. Day 2 of ABC. Things are going wonderful. I bought specific food for my lower calorie days. Things are staring to get back on track.
3. I've started going to the gym again. It's getting harder to jog when your tummy is completely empty. Oh well.
4. I'm back on my sleeping pill regimen. Not too happy about that, but oh well. Shit happens.
I'm almost seeing my new guy. Working on it as we speak. I'll keep you posted.
Wish me luck on day 3 of ABC!
Anabelle
Thursday, January 7, 2010
Are prostitutes and department-store Santa's really that different?
I saw that line on the back of a book at Barnes & Noble today. It made me giggle. I posted that phrase straight to facebook and got tons of comments on it. The best comment "No. They both leave you completely unsatisfied." Funny.
I decided I would try and start the ABC diet either Saturday or Monday. Haven't decided yet. I ended up making plans with some friends that were in town, and half of those plans include eating, so I don't want to make them suspicious or worry them. Worrying my friends means bad things (for instance, and intervention with my school counselor, math teacher, and mother).
I went shopping with my best friend today. She lives about 300 miles away for school, so it was nice to see her for once. We went and tried on tons of clothes. It's so weird buying new clothes. I mean, I've bought new clothes within the past few years, but most of them were too big when I bought them, so they are also too big now. I used to be a medium, and now I'm an extra-small. It's such a weird feeling. Buying pants that are size one. I used to wear a SIZE 11!! It just kind of helps me realize how small I actually am. 'Tis kind of nice, I guess.
But that's definitely not going to get me to stop thinking about the ABC diet.
I'm completely positive that this blog post had a direction I was going to go in, but it's just not coming to me. Lost it... Gone.
Question: What are some good ana movies or books?
I bought the book "Skinny". I cannot remember for the life of me the authors name, but it has a green popsicle on the front cover.
Anywho, Facebook is calling.
Much love, stay strong.
Anabelle
I decided I would try and start the ABC diet either Saturday or Monday. Haven't decided yet. I ended up making plans with some friends that were in town, and half of those plans include eating, so I don't want to make them suspicious or worry them. Worrying my friends means bad things (for instance, and intervention with my school counselor, math teacher, and mother).
I went shopping with my best friend today. She lives about 300 miles away for school, so it was nice to see her for once. We went and tried on tons of clothes. It's so weird buying new clothes. I mean, I've bought new clothes within the past few years, but most of them were too big when I bought them, so they are also too big now. I used to be a medium, and now I'm an extra-small. It's such a weird feeling. Buying pants that are size one. I used to wear a SIZE 11!! It just kind of helps me realize how small I actually am. 'Tis kind of nice, I guess.
But that's definitely not going to get me to stop thinking about the ABC diet.
I'm completely positive that this blog post had a direction I was going to go in, but it's just not coming to me. Lost it... Gone.
Question: What are some good ana movies or books?
I bought the book "Skinny". I cannot remember for the life of me the authors name, but it has a green popsicle on the front cover.
Anywho, Facebook is calling.
Much love, stay strong.
Anabelle
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
My ABC plans...
day1: 500 calories(or less)
day2: 500 calories(or less)
3:300 calories
4:400 calories
5: 100 calories
6: 200 calories
7: 300 calories
8: 400 calories
9: 500 calories
10: fast
11: 150 calories
12: 200 calories
13: 400 calories
14: 350 calories
15: 250 calories
16: 200 calories
17: fast
18: 200 calories
19: 100 calories
20: fast
21: 300 calories
22: 250 calories
23: 200 calories
24: 150 calories
25: 100 calories
26: 50 calories
27: 100 calories
28: 200 calories
29: 200 calories
30: 300 calories
31: 800
32: fast
33: 250 calories
34: 350 calories
35: 450 calories
36: fast
37: 500 calories
38: 450 calories
39: 400 calories
40: 350 calories
41: 300 calories
42: 250 calories
43: 200 calories
44: 200 calories
45: 250 calories
46: 200 calories
47: 300 calories
48: 200 calories
49: 150 calories
50: fast
day2: 500 calories(or less)
3:300 calories
4:400 calories
5: 100 calories
6: 200 calories
7: 300 calories
8: 400 calories
9: 500 calories
10: fast
11: 150 calories
12: 200 calories
13: 400 calories
14: 350 calories
15: 250 calories
16: 200 calories
17: fast
18: 200 calories
19: 100 calories
20: fast
21: 300 calories
22: 250 calories
23: 200 calories
24: 150 calories
25: 100 calories
26: 50 calories
27: 100 calories
28: 200 calories
29: 200 calories
30: 300 calories
31: 800
32: fast
33: 250 calories
34: 350 calories
35: 450 calories
36: fast
37: 500 calories
38: 450 calories
39: 400 calories
40: 350 calories
41: 300 calories
42: 250 calories
43: 200 calories
44: 200 calories
45: 250 calories
46: 200 calories
47: 300 calories
48: 200 calories
49: 150 calories
50: fast
I promised myself I would not become one of those Twilight obsessed girls....
Definitely failed at that one.... I went to the book store the other day and got three new books, with the intentions to finish the third Twilight book, then read my three new ones. It is completely impossible to stop reading those damn books. I have now started the fourth book, and I'm rather perturbed with myself because all my friends have been on my back about starting "Nineteen Minutes" by Jodi Picoult. Yes, I'm a book nerd, get over it.
I weighed myself Monday. I haven't weighed myself since, about, well, Christmas. Yeah, Christmas. I was 122 on Christmas. Haven't been restricting much at all, but surprisingly my weigh in Monday wasn't too bad. I was 119.6 lbs, which is much better than expected. My short term goal is 110, and it will be completely feasible because school starts back up next Monday.
Oh god, I'm so excited to get back to school. Excited to start again. New semester, new teachers, the works. New restrictions. Good times. I actually think my best college friend (I only say this because no one from my high school, or actually anyone I know, goes to my college...I'm so alone) is somewhat ana. I mean, she always talks about how hungry she is but never gets food. We always talk about how tempting the donuts looks as we pass the cafeteria each morning, but we never buy them. Interesting thought, I must say.
Are there American restaurants in Italy? Because we have Italian restaurants here....
Just a thought.
Time to read Breaking Dawn.
Hope all is well. (Sidenote: When I typed "all" I actually typed "ass" first. Funny typos)
Anabelle :-)
I weighed myself Monday. I haven't weighed myself since, about, well, Christmas. Yeah, Christmas. I was 122 on Christmas. Haven't been restricting much at all, but surprisingly my weigh in Monday wasn't too bad. I was 119.6 lbs, which is much better than expected. My short term goal is 110, and it will be completely feasible because school starts back up next Monday.
Oh god, I'm so excited to get back to school. Excited to start again. New semester, new teachers, the works. New restrictions. Good times. I actually think my best college friend (I only say this because no one from my high school, or actually anyone I know, goes to my college...I'm so alone) is somewhat ana. I mean, she always talks about how hungry she is but never gets food. We always talk about how tempting the donuts looks as we pass the cafeteria each morning, but we never buy them. Interesting thought, I must say.
Are there American restaurants in Italy? Because we have Italian restaurants here....
Just a thought.
Time to read Breaking Dawn.
Hope all is well. (Sidenote: When I typed "all" I actually typed "ass" first. Funny typos)
Anabelle :-)
Friday, January 1, 2010
Oh, the new year..... Should I bore you with my resolutions??
Haven't posted in a couple days... grr...
Alright, so... I haven't been restricting for a long while. I kind of decided to just let it be for the holidays. I go back to school in.... 10 days.... so i figure that my schedule will make it much easier to keep up with the restrictions. Ah, I'll put my resolutions down towards the bottom of the post...
So, I promised myself I wasn't going to drink on New Year's, because I had to work at 8am this morning. So, I planned my...plans....accordingly. I ended up going to a party in town that had no drinking whatsoever. It was rather nice for once. Drunk guys get really annoying after a couple hours. Actually, I was going to go to another party instead, but didn't go because everyone was wasted, and I guess there was a huge fight... I would bet you money that if I was there, I would get accidently punched in the face.
Anywho, went to the party. It was fun. Music, games, etc. I ended up playing Twister for like 4 hours. Starting to regret that now. Once you hit the age of 18, your body just goes downhill from there. Hell, I just turned 19, and I'm definitely starting to feel like I'm falling apart. BOYS ARE SO INCREDIBLY ANNOYING AT TWISTER! They're vicious.... it's a fact.
Work today was rather hellish, I must say. I ended up doing inventory of the whole store by myself for 7 hours. Happy New Year's Ana! ugh...
Alrighty, so, I suppose I could state a couple of my resolutions for you...
1. Once school starts, start restrictions again. I would like to become a vegetarian as well.
2. Now that I do not have a Body Conditioning class anymore, I would like to get to the gym a few times a week. Not sure if that is going to be possible, but I'll try it.
3. I want a 4.0 gpa in school, dammit. I printed my grade report off yesterday, and I got 3 A's and 2 B's. Those B's are driving me crazy!
4. I don't really have a number 4 on my resolutions, but, let's make one up now. Oh! I want to make Joshua mine! I've been hanging with him for a couple of months, and I really like him. He was actually the reason my fiance broke it off with me.... oh.... let's not bring him up...
5. I want to learn how to sleep. Honestly, I'm down to like 3 hours a night again. I need more sleep because I can't be tired at school and work. Tired=Mistakes.
Well, this blog has been boring enough... Oh!
6. I want to think of better topics to write in this blog. Make it more interesting, fun, etc.
Wishing you all a Happy New Year! :-)
Much Love,
Ana
Alright, so... I haven't been restricting for a long while. I kind of decided to just let it be for the holidays. I go back to school in.... 10 days.... so i figure that my schedule will make it much easier to keep up with the restrictions. Ah, I'll put my resolutions down towards the bottom of the post...
So, I promised myself I wasn't going to drink on New Year's, because I had to work at 8am this morning. So, I planned my...plans....accordingly. I ended up going to a party in town that had no drinking whatsoever. It was rather nice for once. Drunk guys get really annoying after a couple hours. Actually, I was going to go to another party instead, but didn't go because everyone was wasted, and I guess there was a huge fight... I would bet you money that if I was there, I would get accidently punched in the face.
Anywho, went to the party. It was fun. Music, games, etc. I ended up playing Twister for like 4 hours. Starting to regret that now. Once you hit the age of 18, your body just goes downhill from there. Hell, I just turned 19, and I'm definitely starting to feel like I'm falling apart. BOYS ARE SO INCREDIBLY ANNOYING AT TWISTER! They're vicious.... it's a fact.
Work today was rather hellish, I must say. I ended up doing inventory of the whole store by myself for 7 hours. Happy New Year's Ana! ugh...
Alrighty, so, I suppose I could state a couple of my resolutions for you...
1. Once school starts, start restrictions again. I would like to become a vegetarian as well.
2. Now that I do not have a Body Conditioning class anymore, I would like to get to the gym a few times a week. Not sure if that is going to be possible, but I'll try it.
3. I want a 4.0 gpa in school, dammit. I printed my grade report off yesterday, and I got 3 A's and 2 B's. Those B's are driving me crazy!
4. I don't really have a number 4 on my resolutions, but, let's make one up now. Oh! I want to make Joshua mine! I've been hanging with him for a couple of months, and I really like him. He was actually the reason my fiance broke it off with me.... oh.... let's not bring him up...
5. I want to learn how to sleep. Honestly, I'm down to like 3 hours a night again. I need more sleep because I can't be tired at school and work. Tired=Mistakes.
Well, this blog has been boring enough... Oh!
6. I want to think of better topics to write in this blog. Make it more interesting, fun, etc.
Wishing you all a Happy New Year! :-)
Much Love,
Ana
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